I am exhausted. It's good to be home.
Nan's funeral was on Friday. We got up early on Friday morning to drive nearly 6 hours to Dubbo. Getting ready for the funeral was a little surreal, like it was something else we were getting dressed up for. It really hit me when we got to the church and saying hello to my family. As soon as I stepped into the church I had to tell myself to breathe. My beautiful boyfriend held my hand.
After not being able to speak at my Pa's funeral I am very proud to say that I did my Nan's eulogy. It was mostly my blog post I wrote a few hours after she died, and a few other things that I added to it.
It is definitely one of the hardest things I have ever done. I was the first person up to speak (which I am grateful for) but when I got up there, I had trouble composing myself to talk. My lovely dad got up and stood up there with me and put his arm around me and gently encouraged me when I had trouble. Thank you Dad. I know Nan would have loved it and I am so glad I was able to have that opportunity.
My brother and cousins also did a readings that were lovely and my male cousins and my brother were pallbearers. I couldn't look at them while they did it but they did a wonderful job.
As my cousin said at the wake, it is a shame that it is something like this that brings us all together. I couldn't even tell you the last time I saw everyone in one place so it was really nice in that sense.
My boyfriend and I shared a room with my brother. Love my brother but after not getting much sleep the night before, to then share with my drunk brother snoring his head off, was not at all fun. Highly entertaining while he was drunk and stumbling around though!
I also got to pick some of Nan's jewellery. I am wearing one of her rings now. It is silver with a black stone, it is something I would have picked for myself. I don't really wear any jewellery so it feels quite foreign sitting on my finger, but its nice to look down at it and think of her.
I have it on my middle finger so if I give anyone the finger she will be right there with me. I think she would have had a good chuckle at that.